By Mark Tyrrell
People often run into trouble when they assume that they can do or have something – success, a wonderful relationship, a world-enhancing book under their belt – but don’t plan the steps that will lead to such accomplishment. They sort of hope that things will just fall into their laps.
Celebrity shows like X Factor, America’s Got Talent and other manifestations of our media-driven age subliminally encourage the ‘wishbone where your backbone should be’ attitude to life.
Of course, some people do put in the necessary steps and spend twenty years becoming that ‘overnight success’ that everybody is amazed by. But, clients can have problems if they approach therapy in an all-or-nothing manner.
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Published by roger.elliott January 8th, 2013
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
When your life goes wrong it’s very unpleasant and sometimes it can feel as if it has gone totally wrong.
Of course, some things do go ‘totally wrong’. However, a lot of stuff that goes really badly doesn’t go completely badly. Sometimes things you feel have gone totally wrong have, when you reflect upon it, only gone a bit wrong.
Learning to know the difference can help you keep misery and happiness apart.
For example, Peter came to see me once, loudly decrying the ‘fact’ that he had completely screwed up a speech he’d had to give at work. He was in quite a lot of distress about it, actually hitting himself on the head as he said:
“I made a total idiot of myself! I was so nervous!”
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Published by roger.elliott December 11th, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
When you understand about people’s basic emotional needs you can identify what might be likely to trigger challenging behaviour and what might actually help reduce challenging behaviour, and lead to a calmer environment generally.
Taking the needs of your child or teenager into account can make it easier (and quicker) to identify what needs to change or happen to resolve difficult situations. Likewise, awareness of the basic emotional needs allows you to notice what needs to change to make the environment or situation better for yourself.
When your needs are met, you will have a higher tolerance to stress. And the same applies for your child. If their personal needs are met …
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Published by roger.elliott November 27th, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
We all know about the pink elephant phenomenon. As soon as I say “Don’t think about a pink elephant!” you are instantly more likely to think about a pink elephant. (You just did, didn’t you!)
This is not just folklore, either. Back in 1987, research conducted by Richard Wenzler and Daniel Wegner (1) found that people who were instructed to suppress a thought were twice as likely to think about it as those who were free to think about it if they chose.
It seems to be stress that makes us more likely to fail at thought suppression.
There’s a famous episode from the classic British TV sitcom Fawlty Towers in which Basil Fawlty becomes obsessed about the risk of upsetting some German guests staying at his hotel by accidentally mentioning the war.
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Published by roger.elliott November 13th, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
A Guest Post from Dan Jones – Solution focused hypnotherapist
Many parents of challenging teens who have come through my doors develop three particular skills that really help them to help their teens change their behaviour. These three skills often appear paradoxical, and can sometimes seem, and feel, counter-intuitive. They are so powerful because they:
1. move the focus (and measure of success) away from the parents to the teen, and their emotional needs.
2. help the teen to feel understood and emotionally connected.
3. give the teen a real sense of control and independence.
These paradoxical skills also worked well within residential children’s homes.
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Published by roger.elliott October 30th, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
Clinical depression is never just ‘in the mind’. Emotional disturbance, especially when it is prolonged, will always have an impact on the body.
Physical factors are not the commonest cause of depression, but however it is caused, it certainly has physical (‘somatic’) consequences. Some of these physical consequences can feel terrifying to the depressed person. “What’s happening to me?!” is their common cry.
The more you can reassure your depressed client that what’s been happening to them, while horrible, is a normal part of the pattern of depression, the less they’ll need to worry about these symptoms.
People need to know why these weird somatic symptoms happen, because we are all much less frightened of something we know and understand than we are of the mysterious and unexplained.
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Published by roger.elliott October 16th, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
A Guest Post from Dan Jones – Solution focused hypnotherapist
I have worked with hundreds of parents of young offenders and young people at risk of becoming offenders to reduce and prevent future youth crime and anti-social behaviour. Parents were given an average of six support sessions. From this brief intervention alone there was a 68% reduction in youth offending over the following year. Three years later the reduction rate was still 66% compared to families where parents met the criteria but didn’t get the support.
To achieve lasting results from an average of only six sessions we have to keep highly focused on what the parent hopes to achieve from the support.
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Published by roger.elliott October 2nd, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
In the Master Series article on herd mentality, I talked about how the instinct to go with the herd can stop us being our own person. I mentioned the research that shows that a whacking 75% of us will prefer, at least some of the time, to go along with what the group thinks, even if it conflicts with what our own senses tell us. I also related the famous story of the king’s new clothes and how easy it is to blindly follow beliefs, emotions and behaviours that a wider group holds without really stopping to decide what you think.
Now I want to look at how, if we’re not very careful, we can be manipulated into thinking or doing things we wouldn’t normally think or do because of the perceived power of authority.
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Published by roger.elliott September 18th, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
If depressed clients are able to think about the future at all, the prospect can be bleak, even terrifying. At the heart of depression lies hopelessness – a sense that things will inevitably
- stay as bad as they are, or
- get much worse.
Our depressed clients can feel so overwhelmed by their present difficulties that they don’t even have a sense of a future – which, of course, makes living feel pretty pointless.
Hypnosis is a wonderful tool to help clients relax and take a proper rest from the stress they find themselves under. But it can do more than this – it can help them ‘time travel’, so that they can sample better, more motivating, more satisfying futures.
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Published by roger.elliott August 21st, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
By Mark Tyrrell
Don’t talk with your mouth open!
Why?
Because it’s rude!
Why?
Because it looks horrible!
Why? Why? Why?
The ‘why-mania’ of children can fast track wrung-out parents to the nearest gin palace. Why? Because it can.
But when we stop asking “Why?” we stop thinking clearly, if at all.
Take psychotherapy.
Why do people go for psychotherapy?
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Published by roger.elliott August 7th, 2012
in hypnotherapy-training.
