I was talking to a man socially yesterday who told me how he had been viciously assaulted in broad day light and in a very public place. He certainly suffered trauma for many months after the attack. I asked him what had come to mind during the flashbacks he had suffered and what he felt his nightmares had been about after the event.

He said that, for him, the very worst aspect had been that not one person went to his aid or even discreetly phoned for help. Bystander apathy is common but terrible to be the victim of.

He told me he had felt as assaulted by the people who stood by and did nothing as by the actual (mentally ill) perpetrator of the attack.

He also said that, until speaking to me, he had never really acknowledged that it had taken longer to get over the experience of being ignored by his fellow men and women in his time of need than it had to move on from the actual attack itself.

On the Uncommon knowledge hypnotherapy diploma course we encourage our hypnotherapy students to not assume what element of an experience was the worst for someone in the very same way that it is vital not to automatically assume why, say, someone wants to quit smoking.

I’m happy to say this man has moved on from this traumatic experience but told me he feels a little more cynical about ‘the human race.’ I told him that there is good research to show that people informed about the nature of bystander apathy are likely to become inoculated against it and that understanding human nature can help us rise above what we currently are. I hope it helped.

Mark