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September 2008
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Let me emote in my own way!

I spoke today to a radio journalist who had seen the uncommon knowledge article on the differences between male and female emotionality. She wants me to speak on radio about male emotionality. I got the distinct impression that (whether she had read the article or not) she was gunning for the idea that men should emote more like women, be more ‘in touch’ with their emotions and stop being so ‘repressed’.

Actually as my article, I hope, suggests there are good reasons why men process emotions differently to women and it’s not just a question that women present the ideal way of expressing emotions that men need to learn in order to be emotionally healthier. It seems that women and men emote differently (generally). Not right or wrong jut different.

I think demanding that people should emote the same or to some ‘healthy’ standard is to miss the point. We experience life events differently and also grieve differently.

Not everyone who has lived through a traumatic event will be traumatized long term and not everyone who experiences depressing circumstances will become depressed. I think when they ask me, as they surely will, how can a man better get in touch with his feelings I may not give them the answer they were expecting, ho hum.

Mark

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