The Germans’ have a word for a concept we all understand. The word is “shadenfraud” which loosely translated means: joy in someone else’s suffering. And who was it that that said: ‘The worst affront to your friends in to become a success’?

People are more likely to experience shadenfraud if they were a, envious or jealous of the unfortunate person or b, didn’t like them much for some other reason.

Of course shadenfraud is not something that most people like to admit to (even if they can pronounce it.) You might feel delighted that someone you know is unfortunate enough to experience shadenfraud. Yet there are other ways to contemplate our fellows’ struggles and calamities which are more worthy and productive.

For example we may be dissatisfied with what we have (and feel we haven’t got) until we contemplate what others have to contend with. Gratitude is a key to good mental-even physical health-see The cost of freedom

The more we look to others the more we compare ourselves to them-either favorably or unfavorably. How we compare ourselves influences such factors as self esteem whether we are prone to bystander apathy and even whether we believe ourselves to be suffering from a non-existent illness (see The law of social proof)

Sympathy, understanding and active efforts to help are, of course, more productive responses to the suffering of those around us than to rub our hands together gleefully. Although our disappointments may be easier to bear when we hear of the let downs in the lives of those around us.

According to this piece I read today hearing of other peoples’ misfortune can help to alleviate our own regret if we feel that we cannot change things for the better in future. If we do feel we can actively influence the future for the better our own regret can act as fuel to affect those changes.
And that’s positive in anyone’s’ language.

Mark